Ohio

A few days ago in the car, me and the boys were talking about different languages, who speaks what, etc. John asked, “What do they speak in Ohio?” He thinks Ohio is some far-off exotic land. I was about to say “English,” but then I thought, I’ll have some fun at the expense of buckeyes and hoosiers. I said, “there’s no telling, really. You cross that river and there’s just no telling what will happen, or how weird it can get.”

Eyes got bigger in the mirror. I said, “you see this mirror? Well, we call it a mirror. But in Indiana, it’s their compass… you look in it and it tells you who’s lost.” They looked at me, wondering what is wrong with those people across the river.

I did finally tell them they speak English over there… but it doesn’t sound right.